Looking back, I can see that my testimony of the truthfulness of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was being built long before my wife introduced me to the missionaries. I look back and see so many events in my life as steps, leading me to the ultimate decision to be baptized.
I was brought up in a family without a specific church or religion, but I was always taught to honor God and to have faith in Jesus Christ. This was most definitely the first step.
The next big step came when I was a freshman in high school. I was a 2nd hand witness to things in my neighborhood that I a young person should never have to experience. However, because of these things, I was led to leave Las Vegas and spend six months with my grandparents in Whitefish, Montana. While there, I attended a Four-Square Gospel Christian Church. I went "religiously". I attended a few weekend retreats, and during those retreats I discovered how truly powerful and caring the Lord is. I learned that the Lord has a purpose for me, and it was up to me to make more righteous choices. I did just that...for a while. I soon moved back to Las Vegas, and found my old friends and got caught back up in old habits. My new found spirituality dimmed, but was not extinguished.
My senior year in high school, life seemed like it was going well. I had a lot of friends and I was invited to a lot of parties. I remember one night before bed...I don't remember exactly what prompted me to do this, but I remember kneeling down and praying the most humble and sincere prayer that I remember ever uttering to that point in my life. I remember saying the words, "I know that there is something more for me. Help me find it."
The Lord did exactly that...though it took a long time to really look back and see what the Lord was doing.
Two weeks after that prayer, I met my beautiful wife. This was the third step.
We dated for a while, and it didn't take long for me to realize that this girl was the girl that I was going to marry. Time was all we needed. I was 17 and she was 16. My wife didn't attend church regularly during the first part of our dating, but she always wanted to. She had nobody to go with, so she didn't go. But pretty soon she got the "bright" idea that I might be willing to go with her. This happened when I expressed to her that I wanted to get back into reading The Bible. She said, "why don't you try reading The Book of Mormon too?" I laughed...
I did attend church with her though, and actually, I kind of liked it. The first Sunday of every month is called a "Fast and Testimony Meeting". I thought that it was really cool because it is sort of like an "Open Mic". The members get up and bare their testimonies without rehearsal or preparation. I was deeply impressed. Then I was even more impressed when I found out that members were the ones giving the talks every week. The members study and then they teach. How awesome of an idea!
After I had dated my wife for a year and a half and after attending church several times, she asked what I was thinking of it all. I told her that I was enjoying myself, but that I was not ready to go through the missionary discussions. Secretly I knew that if I got involved with the missionaries, I would join the church and I would have to change a lot of things in my life. I just didn't feel ready for that step yet..... My wife thought otherwise.
I was at her house, and the doorbell rang. She saw who was at the door and asked me to answer it. When I did so, somehow...they knew me by name....
In order to move on, I must back track a little bit.
Since the time I was a kid I had a terrible fear about the end of the world. I watched for the signs of the times, I contemplated how it would happen, and even when I slept, I sometimes had dreams.
One particular dream stood out because I couldn't shake the feeling of it the next day.
I was looking out the window of my bedroom when I saw the world falling apart. I looked into the sky and saw two moons (For some reason this was a known prophecy of the end in my dream). Many parts of Las Vegas were burning. Everything I saw told me that this was the end. I kneeled down to pray and to be forgiven, but I couldn't. The feeling that I felt in my dream is indescribable. I was stuck, lost, hopeless... those words don't satisfy the frightening feeling of trying to repent too late.
I tell that account because it leads in to an important part of my testimony during the missionary discussions. It was after the 2nd or 3rd discussion that I had an identical dream... from the two moons down to the burning Las Vegas Valley. However their was one key difference. This time, when I realized that the end of the world was here, I looked out the window, raised my arms up, and let the brightest of all lights come over me. I knew that I was taken care of.
When I woke up, I did not have the lasting sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I didn't have a fear of impending doom. I felt peace. I felt good. I felt whole. This was the first moment in which I knew that the decision that I was making to be baptized was a righteous decision.
It was about a month later that I was baptized on June 28th 2001. (I just turned seven 3 days ago!)
Everything that the missionaries said just seemed to make sense. Something I had never really thought about was the need to have a prophet on the earth. In the times that we live in...no other generation on earth has dealt with the things we deal with. The Lord has a lot to say to us... Amos tells us in the Old Testament, “Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets” (Amos 3:7).
I have so many experience that have fortified my testimony in the gospel (some of which will be shared later on this site), but let me just end this entry by saying, since that day that I made the decision to be baptized... The Lord's hand has been all but visible to me. I have witnessed miracles. I have felt the promptings and quiet assurance of the Holy Ghost witnessing the truthfulness of the gospel. My life has been easier to bring together since I made the decision not to do it alone. It wasn't more than 2 months after being baptized that I decided to become a school teacher... I couldn't think of a better profession...but I just never really thought of it before that time.
My relationship with Tawnie has bloomed into the relationship that I only ever dreamed about before. I have a beautiful daughter who only came to us after much prayer (That's why we named her Eliana...It's Hebrew for "God has Answered". And the best part...We have the opportunity to be together forever...
I know that my redeemer lives.
I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God.
I know that we have a prophet on the earth today.
I know the Jesus Christ died to atone for our sins.
I know that he arose on the 3rd day so we can rise again as well.
I leave this testimony with you all in the name of Jesus Christ - Amen
Monday, June 30, 2008
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1 comment:
Wow!That is really powerful Adam. I was trying to figure out which blog you all use and I ended up reading this one. What a wonderful way to share the gospel. And your humble conversion story is very powerful! You and Tawnie really are doing things right and it's evident in the way you are so easy to be around and how uplifting you both are. You don't see that very often and when you do, you appreciate it.
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